Is There Such A Thing? Can We Blame Them?

Is There Such A Thing? Can We Blame Them?

It is normal for children to try and push boundaries, it's all about growing up. They are trying to assert themselves as individuals and they are learning to express their opinions and preferences. There are ways of teaching children the difference between expressing themselves with 'good' behaviour and 'bad' behaviour.


One of the biggest jobs as a parent is disciplining your child. Discipline is the process of teaching your child what type of behavior is acceptable and what type is not acceptable. Discipline teaches a child to follow rules and may involve punishment, but more importantly, rewards. It sounds so straightforward, yet every parent becomes frustrated at one time or another with issues surrounding children and discipline. As a parent or carer, you are responsible to help your child become self-reliant, respectful, and self-controlled. Acknowledging good behavior is the best way to encourage your child to continue it.

Compliment your child when he or she shows the behavior you've been seeking. Sometimes there isn't a logical or natural consequence for a bad behavior, the consequence in this case may be taking away a privilege. For example, a favourite toy. The key to effective discipline is to understand who your child is, especially his temperamental style, and use your discipline to help him achieve his potential given those talents and tendencies. To children who are old enough to understand, during a planned discussion (not in the heat of the moment) explain the technique, why you are using it, and what you hope it will accomplish. Older children may be included in choosing which rewards and consequences would be appropriate. Consistency and being respectful towards your child, even when they are being punished will help your child respect you and other family members. By not breaking the discipline rule and by enforcing consequences, this will help your child understand that there are outcomes for bad behaviour.

If you notice a pattern of inappropriate behavior, part of the solution is to look for why they are behaving this way. Perhaps your child has had a bad day at school or is under stress. These explanations don't excuse the behavior, but trying to understand why bad behavior occurs can help you and your child find ways to prevent the behavior from happening again and again. Listening to children can help them to manage feelings and consequently, it may stop your child from behaving badly. This technique is used to help activate a child’s higher thinking brain rather than the lower brain which can create threat. As a result, it may leave your child with a neglected level of fear/anger in response to life and the world. Effective discipline is the cornerstone for understanding a child’s social, moral and emotional intelligence which will instill a sense of social responsibility in your child.